Take my husband, PLEASE!

No, I'm not searching for a Big Love - style tag team partner. I'm searching for a JOB, a position of full time EMPLOYMENT, some sort of Bring Home Dee Bacon On a Regular Basis Occupation for my Main Squeeze.

Charles is a casualty of the massive lay-off design of AstraZeneca (motto: "We don't need no steeenkeeeeng research!") in its plan to ditch the "R" of R&D. Considering the American Big Pharma trend in abandoning in-house research in favor of buying up smaller shops, he is ready to try a new industry.

Big Oil? Are you listening?

Corporate Farm, Inc? We're talkin' to YOU too!

We'll go anywhere, relo is not a prob, Bob!!

What's that? You say you're a Hiring Manager, in search of (or, "ISO," I think the kids are saying) an NMR spectroscopist with 11 years of industrial experience and the all-important Ph.D.? You say you need this person to have an eerie MacGyver-way of solving problems and producing results? Oh, and this applicant should speaky de THREE languages fluently? And not require visa sponsorship? And be eligible to work ANYWHERE in these United States of America?

DING DING DING!!!! We have a winner!

May I present to you, The Dr. Charles Babu. NMR Spectroscopist to the Stars. Analytical Chemist Extraordinaire. The Gandhi of Linux, The Guru of Handyman Repairs.

He can build a laptop with a check-book cover, a hairpin, and a Barbie shoe. And it'll be faster than that pc mess you're working on right now. And that's just his HOBBY. Imagine what he could do with your million dollar lab!!

He'll mentor your interns and educate your Six Sigma team with efficiencies you've only read about in Stephen Hawking's inkblot interpretations. And he won't even call a MEETING to do it........ he'll just transfer whatever you need to know via....
wait for it.......... are you sitting down?

Direct Communication.

*GASP*

I'll give you a minute to catch your breath.

If you have a question, he'll have an ANSWER. He won't chitterchat about accountability or question your motives. He won't call a meeting, form a steering committee or create a powerpoint reproduction of the matter (unless you want one). He'll just pinpoint the issue, and announce "Well, THERE'S your problem!"

And then he'll fix it. Just like he fixed my fridge, washer, dryer, Honda Civic, Honda Accord, garbage disposal and electrical outlets, all in the last few months. He won't procrastinate and he WILL read the directions!!

So your warranties will remain intact.

How many times have you looked at that test tube of The Next Billion Dollar Product, shaken your head, squinted at the spectrum and said to yourself, "Great, but what the hell is that OTHER stuff? We can't put that in a pill! Especially not knowing what it IS!"

He'll find your impurities, tell you what they are, if they matter and how to get RID of them. Funky solvent? Odd precipitate? Curious color? Charles to the rescue!

You say you need a paper trail, huh? You've got "authorities" and "regulations" and "compliance issues?" You need your procedures VALIDATED? Charles is all over GLP/GMP like white. on. rice. Your Regulatory Team will feel like they've had a Spa Day upon inspecting Charles' reports and lab. "Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..."

Call now! Operators are standing by.